miss those dayz....

i used to think that i may be the only one person that can be all my friends heart mender... but i was wrong... most of my friends never listen to me.. and talking to them is like talking to a wall.. for those who ignore, when i give advise or anything, they wont bother to listen... even though they do but they will just forget it... anyway, today i went to skating with my friends because they were like so free and nothing to do.. oh ya.. yesterday i just made a friend.. who was my church friend and then an aquaintance, then friend again.. then good friend.. then my godsister... who is the only one who calls me bro, in chinese? cantonese? hokkien? not sure but.. she called me big brother just like that... so cool.. i mean its just so nice you know.. when she call me that.. i feel so respected..so loved.. because no one else dares to call me like that. only she and my real sister calls me that... its just so happy... anyway.. she is dating currently.. so ... i think i like her.. haha .. maybe not... hm... eventhough i am.. i still dont have a chance.. she might not accept me.. haha.. but still we're like a family now.. just uh... sharing to each other what we have... its kinda.. haha.. think i am crazy.. anyway, i skate i think for the whole day today.. crazy much? haha.. skated that long because of wanna know people more.. and um.. of all friends i invited, only one came and he is like a half brother and sister to me.. haha nevermid lar.. hmm... just thinking about her makes me feel happy... just so.. nice.. so friendly lar.. she... but sadly sha cant be mine... she aready have a boyfriend.. so no chance... i dreamt about her last night... me and here in a same school.. and this is not the first time.. the first was another girl.. but they were same subs but different stories..... so

missing you!

its been so long ever since i blogged... because its so busy and then now that exam is over i have been looking for a chance to type lar.... anyway.. so many things have happened... but i dont know where too start... only yesterday my friends were so close... but today we kinda like think our own ways and separated... in another way of explaining it is like this lar... latety i have this feeling to dance i dont know why... like when i see people performing i kinda like wanna join but i dont have the skills and experience. recently i have lost kinda a friend because she says that i am self centered and um... im ignoring her a lot because of reasons.. a lot of reasons... and she is really annoying and a lot more.. i just want her to hate me because i wanna let her know that i am not a good person and i dont want her to regret being friends with me.. so its like now or never. haiz... anyway... as i was saying... my friends and i are going apart and apart.. i dont not have the love of my friends and the some sort of feeling that i cant explain...eventhough god sisters and brothers, my god sister is shy and she doesn't like to go out with me... she doesn't act serious in this kinda things.... for my other friends its kinda lucky cuz.. their godsister calls them 'kor' how touching.. if mine were to be like that then good lar.. but then.... :( sad.... but anyway.. anyhow also nothing will happen in the end... haiz.. i think i like someone... haha but sadly that girl already have a boyfriend..so sad... yet so adorable... tell everybody life is beautiful.. just that some people dont know how to appreciate it... anyway.. as i was saying.. i just know this person since today and i already like her.. she is just so adorable.. jealorus of her... but nevermind.. its not that she is gonna say i like you to me or anything.. haiz... dont know what else to say lar... too tired to think... tomorrow going to qb to skate.. so have to keep energy... okay lar.... gotta go sleep.. blog next time...